It’s been a busy few weeks, what with the election, the Petraeus scandal, the Thanksgiving holiday, and UConn being dissed yet again by the ACC, so I thought I might provide a quick rundown of what’s been going on with some of the major players.
President Obama: Gloating is not the right word. A better description would be … OK, maybe gloating is the right word.
Mitt Romney: Well, we know the Mittster pumped his own gas one day, and he had lunch with President Obama at the White House. Oh, and he went to Disneyland, although I don’t think he understood you usually only go to Disneyland if you win.
Joe Biden: Opened an account at Costco, and probably had his teeth buffed a time or two.
Chris Murphy: Busy measuring his new Senate office for drapes.
Joe Lieberman: Leaves office in 32 days and roughly 12 hours, 30 minutes, and 22 seconds … but who’s counting?
Linda McMahon: Haven’t seen hide nor hair of her since the election. Some people are reportedly experiencing a void in their lives now that her television commercials aren’t on 24/7.
David Petraeus: Haven’t seen much of him either since he resigned, but then he has a lot of ‘splainin to do at home.
Patricia Broadwell: Working on new title for paperback edition of her Petraeus biography, “All In.” Current front runner, “My Bad.”
Jill Kelley: Looking for new honorary consul gig.
Gen. John Allen: Busy closing all his Gmail accounts.
FBI Agent Fred Humphries: In gym working on his pecs.
Sen. John McCain: Spending most of his time attacking UN Ambassador Susan Rice, although no one is exactly sure why.
Sen. Lindsey Graham: Doing whatever John McCain is doing.
Grover Norquist: His power waning, reportedly looking for understudy work on Sesame Street.
The Big East: Rumored to be courting the University of Guam.
Warde Manuel: UConn athletic director holed up in his office watching game films of Louisville’s athletic director in action.
Déja vu All Over Again
So, Tom Foley is going to run for governor again. Republicans used to think a rich, self-funding candidate from Greenwich was a good thing. Of course, that was before Linda McMahon dropped a $100 mill and lost two bids for the U.S. Senate. And then, too, Foley himself lost the last time he ran for governor. Will Republicans double down on this strategy? Or how about triple down and run a Foley-McMahon ticket?
Fiscal Cliff
If Thelma and Louise, Obama and Boehner (or Boehner and Obama) don’t get the fiscal cliff thing worked out soon, we’re all going to starting looking for wide open plains with a 200-foot drop at the end.
The Weak In Tweet
@jimboshea
NFL players using Viagra as stimulant: Whole new meaning for phrase “getting up for the game.”
Yesterday I wake up to find UConn not in ACC, today I wake up to find I didn’t win Powerball. Just can’t catch a break.
Hey anybody see a bunch of bags of sheep guts?
Of course all the Republicans would like to see John Kerry as Sec of State then they could run Scott Brown for his senate seat in Mass.
So I’m thinking Big 10 goes after UConn and BC. This solidifies TV markets in NJ, NYC, Boston and all of New England.
Not surprised by ACC snub. Said it before, ACC has a thing about UConn. Louisville? So much for ACC academic boasts.
Can you dip a drumstick in coffee?
Song Of The Weak
“You Better Not Look Down” (B.B. King)
Note: This is the song playing as Thelma and Louise drive off the non-fiscal cliff.
