Smart People Don't Go Out During Hurricanes

I’m keeping my blog entry short today, on account of Hurricane Sandy and the fact that we all have more important things to do than read this. I just want to issue a warning to everyone. Actually, don’t even consider this a warning, just a quick piece of advice. I know that the media exaggerates everything, and after hearing all the Sandy hype many people are apt to think, “screw this, I’ll be fine.” Yes, the odds of you dying in this hurricane are low, probably like 0.0002%. The odds are low, but the stakes are very high. If you are one of the few people who dies during this storm, you’ll forever be known as the moron who thought he was smart enough to beat a hurricane. You’ll be mocked by everyone who reads your obituary and you’ll go down as an example of how not to live. “Hey, did you hear about the idiot who went waterskiing during Hurricane Sandy?” That idiot will be you. The media over-inflates the lives of almost everyone who dies. Heath Ledger was a good actor, then he died and became a legend. Michael Jackson was a child molester. He died and people only talked about his musical greatness. Even Bin Laden was mourned by a few people. But people who die in hurricanes aren’t mourned. They’re mocked. So if you want to be the idiot who the entire country makes fun of tomorrow morning, the person who is below Bin Laden on the compassion-receiving scale, then drive through the eye of the hurricane, go to the beach, grab some downed power lines, have a blast. Otherwise, stay inside and enjoy the day off. You have an excuse to get drunk all day and do nothing. Seize that opportunity. That is what a smart person would do.


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