By Amy Dickinson
Ask Amy: Advice for the Real World
6:28 PM EDT, September 28, 2014
DEAR AMY: I have four mostly grown children ages 14 to 19.
They don't text at the table because they know it isn't tolerated in our home.
I have a friend with whom our family often shares meals.
Her mostly grown children of similar ages do text at the table - both in her home and at ours.
This is not OK with me in my home.
How do I politely and kindly tell my friend that the whole family is welcome but I do not welcome telephones at the table?
If you tell me to just tolerate this rudeness for the sake of the friendship, I will. This friendship is golden. -- Old-fashioned Mom
DEAR MOM: There is no reason to tolerate rudeness when it could be easily - and politely - averted.
If you are such close friends with this other family that you regularly share meals, you should also feel comfortable saying to all of the kids, "Guys, let's put the phones away while we're at dinner. We're turning our dinner table into a 'no-phone zone.'"
Obviously, this household rule would extend only to the confines of your own table. At your friend's house, she sets the standard.
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