RedEye's mailbag: Quick 'n' dirty sex and love questions answered

It's summer, and because it's hookup season, let's do this week's advice column hookup-style, i.e. quick 'n' dirty? Yeah, you like it.

My girlfriend likes it rough. Is it considered a faux-pas to leave bruises?
If she asks for them, it's fine. Just try to avoid the areas that are highly visible. Despite what's shouted in the throes of ecstasy, people still have to go to work the next day. This will spare your lover the "So you're wearing a scarf indoors in June, why?" conversation.

I'm 20 years old and went on a date with my friend, and the next thing you know, we were having sex. I feel attracted to him, but I don't know what to do. Should I try to make it work or just forget about him?
Lines like "and the next thing you know" are a cop out. No more "whoopsies." Be intentional with your desires and express them. Then all you can do is hope for the best. If he's a friend that you trust, then it shouldn't be too hard or awkward. Don't ignore the situation simply because you might get hurt.

My girlfriend of four years has moved out of my house and is now living with another guy. She meant so much to me, and I feel like I meant nothing to her, even though she tells me she loves me and I believed it. She won't move back to my house for anything. What advice do you have about this about this quandary?
Move on with your life. She obviously has.

Why is my boyfriend on Facebook all the time?
Masturbation fodder.

How do I know if he really likes me or if he's just in it for the sex?
If you really don't know the difference between those two things, then I probably can't help you. But, OK. You'll know it when you stop using sex as a bartering tool. It's your body and life, and you can do what you please with it. Also, if you're really lost at sea(men), you could try asking him.

I'm 32. Where do I fit in the spectrum of ages in the BDSM community?
I must've missed that question when the census came around. According to Find The Best, a website for "unbiased, data-driven comparisons," 68 percent of people on Fetlife (the social network for kinksters) are 35 and older. So, you skew slightly young. Congratulations!

Any tips for a plus-size gentleman? I have zero experience with online dating because of a general belief that internet dating is for pretty people.
Don't be too self-deprecating. Confidence is sexier than a six pack. Also, that last sentence: Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Ha.

Want to ask Anna an anonymous question about love, sex or dating? Email your quandary to redeyedating@gmail.com.  Need to give your dating life a boost? Sign up for RedEye Dating. Pick dates, not people.

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