If you've made it this far into the Stanley Cup Final without a trip to your sports therapist (do those exist?), you're ahead of the game. This Blackhawks-Bruins series has delivered more drama than Amanda Bynes' Twitter account. With as many as three games left, there are bound to be a boatload of highs and lows before a champion is crowned.
But first thing's first: Survive Saturday's Game 5 at the United Center. Keep refreshing this story for high-fives and low-fives throughout the game.
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Low-five: Jonathan Toews is nowhere to be found at the beginning of the third period. Could be hurt. Chances are we won't know until after this series. Cross your fingers he's OK, Hawks fan.
Low-five: Chara thunders one past Crawford to make it 2-1. Well, the Hawks held him at bay this long. If they're lucky, that's the only one he gets.
High-five: Solid rush for Michael Frolik, who almost beats Rask five-hole. "We will go to winning."
High-five: Kane gets into a mini-scuffle with Andrew Ference. Not the kind of shots No. 88 usually prefers. But it's good to say he isn't taking any @#$% from Boston.
High-five: GOAL! Dave Bolland seals it with an empty-netter with 13.6 seconds left. Blackhawks lead the series 3-2, thankyouverymuch.
Score: Blackhawks 3, Bruins 1
Low-five: Nathan Horton goes to the box for hooking ... but so does Michal Handzus for embellishing. What is this, World Cup soccer?
Low-five: Adam McQuaid piggyback-rides Viktor Stalberg for a good 10 seconds along the board during a scramble for the puck. Uh, in some countries you have to pay for that, Adam.
High-five: GOAL! Kane puts back yet another rebound. He's making a habit of being in the right place at the right time. Perfect timing for that.
High-five: Adam McQuad goes off to the box for roughing up Andrew Shaw. Otherwise known as: Shaw doing his job.
High-five: Michal Handzus almost makes it 3-0 in the waning few seconds of the period. No breaks for you, Mr. Rask.
Score: Blackhaws 2, Bruins 0
Low-five: 15 seconds in, Patrick Kane gets a clean look at a one-timer ... and smashes it high and wide. Oh well.
Low-five: Bruins captain Zdeno Chara plants Kaner into the boards. 6-9 vs. 5-11. Just a teensy bit of a mismatch ...