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Getting over the angst in calling my transgender child 'they'

Getting over the angst in calling my transgender child 'they'

Years ago when I was an overwhelmed and weepy new mother, a therapist informed me that parenthood is just one long series of losses. I walked out of her office never to return, but her words have stuck with me for 22 years as I've learned the tricky dance of motherhood.

Your baby learns to walk and runs away from you. Your shy child is too busy with preschool friends to wave goodbye to you. Your tween begs to go away to camp (OK, mine didn't do that, but hypothetically). Each alleged "loss" for you is a gain for your child — and a remarkable, heart-bursting gain for you, too, when seen in the right light.

Like most parents, I had to learn that the point is not to...

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