Brian O'Connor

Consumer protections are going to the Piggies

Old Man 2016 is tottering out of town -- to be recalled about as fondly as a mob hit man -- while Baby New Year crawls in bearing a yuuge can of Chinese-made spray tanner.

How bad was 2016? This year not only killed Prince, David Bowie, Gene Wilder, Glenn Frey, Gordie Howe, Muhammad Ali, Mrs. Brady and Carrie Fisher but also came for Patty Duke AND her TV dad, and didn't quit until it ran its icy finger of death through Debbie Reynolds. The year 2016 was a raging global toxic Dumpster fire futility doused by coalmine sludge with the run-off shunted through the Dakota Access Pipeline and bottled as Trump Organic Baby Shampoo.

Which brings us to our annual Piggy Bank Awards...