Crime & Punishment: Middletown Man Arrested For Pulling Out His Girlfriend's Weave

Four Ansonia residents were given a pass on paying town taxes on their automobiles, although records obtained by the Valley Independent Sentinel show they owed a collective $16,666 in delinquent taxes (some dating back to the '90s). Two of the residents are employed by the town, one serves on a town board and the last has the same last name as Tax Collector Bridget Bostic. The town was not quick to hand these files over to the news website; a town attorney purportedly told reporter Jodie Mozdzer that it would cost $1,000 in fees and take a long time to compile the information. But Mozdzer had better luck requesting them through the Freedom of Information Act. Town Hall cancelled a meeting between Mozdzer and Bostic due to "personal reasons" but Mayor James Della Volpe swore he would act on this "new" information.

Two Brooklyn men, who happen to be working on a musical about the life of The Notorious B.I.G., allegedly tried to steal $868 worth of books from a Westport Barnes and Noble. Police found several titles taken from the store in back of a Jaguar (including nine sets of the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy and three copies of R. Kelly's memoir Soula Coaster). Two men, Raheim Pope and the aptly nicknamed Alfred "Paper Love" Green, were arrested. They initially denied they had any connection to the Jaguar, police told the Connecticut Post, but for a reduced bond Green revealed that Pope was hiding the keys in his rectum, which a metal detector confirmed. (According to internet reports, Green, 40, had been writing and Pope, 37, was to produce Ready 2 Die, a musical based on the life of the late rapper, but no opening date or venue has been announced.)

Jermaine Campbell, who had recently been hired to work in the Trumbull tax collector's office, apparently had a side gig as drug dealer. Police allegedly caught Campbell, 21, hanging around a playground (just like drug dealers do in public service announcements) with large stashes of marijuana and ecstasy in his car. Tax Collector Mary Moran told the Connecticut Post, congenially, that Campbell was "a gentleman and so professional," but she doesn't "think he should be back to work here, working with tax money." (Maybe she'll still provide a good reference.)

Are you lonesome tonight? The two children of an Elvis Presley impersonator, ages two years and seven months, were, the night he and his wife left them in a heartbreaking hotel room while he performed at the Foxwoods Resort and Casino, according to police. When officers caught up with the parents, the father, 22-year-old Tyler Hunter, was allegedly "belligerent," getting all shook up about his need for sleep, reports The Day. He and wife, 27-year-old Deborah Hundley, ended the night doing the jailhouse rock.

Christopher Thomas' neighbor thought Thomas was coming over to "have a peaceful, grown-up and mature conversation" about the amount of noise he was making by building a stone wall on his New Fairfield property. Therefore he was surprised when Thomas, 65, started yelling profanities and then entered his vehicle and allegedly tried to run him down in his own driveway, police told the Danbury News-Times. (The neighbor escaped serious injury.)

Sick, Sad World: After repeatedly kicking and pummeling his Jack Russell terrier, 32-year-old Alexander Rosario tried to "fling" the dog over a fence and onto a highway in Derby, a police lieutenant told the Valley Independent Sentinel. (Police had been called about another alleged animal abuse incident involving Rosario less than 24 hours earlier.) The dog's collar got stuck on a spike, leaving him hanging from the fence, mostly unharmed.

Michael Fagan reportedly pulled a knife on a cashier at the Elite Mini-Mart in Norwalk. The employee ran out and closed the security gate on his way. A few minutes later, police opened the gate to find Fagan, 30, "standing inside" as he "expressed confusion," according to the Norwalk Patch.

Ronnie Holley of Middletown was arrested for allegedly pulling out his girlfriend's weave. Holley, 53, reportedly told police she plucked the weave herself (with enough force to remove some of her own hair) to frame him (because he had refused to give her money) and it was actually him who called 911. However, that kind of the thing can be checked and police say it was the girlfriend who called, reports the Middletown Patch website.

A New Haven family was allegedly housing 25 chickens and two goats in their apartment (that's right, apartment, not house). City officials, who investigated on account of the lingering of a kind of odor "associated with farm animals," told WTNH they recovered 11 chickens roaming outside, nine from a crate in the basement, five running loose in the house and one under quarantine, as well as two goats in the bedroom.