Crime & Punishment: Stratford Man Displays Nazi Flag "Until Obama Changes His Policies"

Using logic, Joseph Sincavage of Stratford decided to display a Nazi flag outside his own home to protest unspecified policies of President Obama. The swastika flutters next to U.S., Vatican and Marine Corps flags at the Sincavage residence and replaces a mildly less racist and offensive emblem, the Confederate flag, which he had been displaying. Though he's become the scorn of his neighborhood, Sincavage, 73, told the Stratford Star he's going to display the Nazi flag "until Obama changes his policies, resigns or gets impeached." He also said he planned to order an Israeli flag from the online flag superstore where he apparently spends his entire Social Security check, "so Jewish people won't think I'm mad at them or anything like that." Oh, gee, why would they get that impression from a Nazi flag?

A man was spotted wildly throwing sand on a West Haven beach before tossing off his shoes and running into the water. Though he only made it 15 feet out, he seemed to try to drown, diving beneath the waves and not coming up, reports the New Haven Register. A police officer on the scene removed his gun, shirt and bullet-proof vest and waded in to retrieve him. When the cop reached him, the man's body was bobbing next to the standing officer's chest. Back on the shore, the officer performed chest compressions to force the almost-drowner to spit up water. The man (who police suspect just might have been using drugs) explained he was testing a friend, seeing if he would run in to save him. Apparently, the friend did not think this particular individual's worth to society was more than his own.

Never Surrender!: Matthew Dragone of Middletown allegedly started pelting his ex with text messages and sent a box of chocolate-covered strawberries to her workplace, despite her restraining order against him. Police arrived at his grandmother's house, where the elderly woman nonchalantly told them, "Matt's inside his room, go on in and take him," reports the Middletown Press. Dragone, 29, was allegedly hiding behind a chair when police found him. Meanwhile, New London police tracked Michael Judd, wanted on suspicion of burglary, to a relative's apartment. Judd, 34, allegedly laid low at the bottom of a pile of laundry and refused to come out until officers sicked a police dog on him, reports WTNH.

Organizers of the Run for Your Life races hold 5k obstacle courses, where runners dodge lumbering volunteers in full zombie makeup. They have planned 20 events across the U.S. this summer, including a race and all-day "apocalypse party," at Wilderness Lake in Willington, but First Selectwoman Christina Mailhos beat back the horde of the undead with something truly horrifying: zoning regulations! Her ghastly list of requirements included approval from five separate state and local agencies and a $1.2 million insurance policy, reports the Journal Inquirer. Organizers said it was the most unreasonable response they'd ever encountered and relocated their apocalypse to Rehoboth, Mass.

Cristin Millen says her family was denied membership to the Ellington Ridge Country Club after she inquired about an exception to its rule against floatation devices in its pool for her autistic son. Millen told the Hartford Courant that 8-year-old Aiden is a fine swimmer but she takes the precaution of a life vest because she read autistic children can underestimate the dangers of water. The Tolland County club told her the accommodation could not be made and nixed her application, she says. It's almost enough to make you suspect country clubs are full of petty, discriminatory assholes.

A Southington man visiting Boston allegedly ran up behind a woman and grabbed her wallet, reports the Boston Globe. Before he did, he dropped two bags he was carrying, one which contained both a letter from his mother showing his name and address and a copy of his birth certificate, making it fairly easy for police to identify 26-year-old Zachary Tentoni as a suspect.

A souring friendship allegedly led Nicole Ojeda of Middletown to light another woman's shoes on fire. The woman had left the $85 Air Max Nike sneakers at Ojeda's apartment and after their falling out, Ojeda, 21, burnt the shoes and mocked her former friend by posting a photo of the blaze on Instagram, police told the Middletown Press.

Two slick con men from New York state tried to steal used cooking grease from a Norwalk burger and hot dog joint, police told The Hour. Rodrigo Avila and Johnny Flores allegedly pulled up behind Swanky Frank's and siphoned the nasty-ass stuff from a dumpster. The grease can sell from up to $4 a gallon to some alternative fuel manufacturers.

Scott Hickey was allegedly caught hanging out in Bethel's Meckauer Park while totally naked, according to the Danbury News-Times. The police report also notes that Hickey, 48, was "aroused."