Crime & Punishment: Out of Control Bridgeport Man Attacks Police Officer With an Urn

For the last six years, Republican state legislators have put together an alternative budget to the one presented and usually enacted by Democrats, who have strong majorities in both houses of the legislature. This year, however, the GOP declined to offer their own plan, probably because party leaders in both state houses are considering running for governor in 2014 and facets of the budget would no doubt be criticized in the campaign. The Democrats first mocked this by posting a document titled "GOP's Budget Proposal" on their website. The PDF file consists of a title page and 79 blank pages. For their next display, they attempted to send intern Matt Wildman into the Legislative Office Building in a chicken costume to deliver wings to the Republicans but Capital police told him he couldn't enter with his face covered. The website CT News Junkie reports that Wildman stripped down to pants and a gray T-shirt and left the chicken wings outside the GOP offices but police also confiscated the food.

Police responded to a call about an "out of control" man in a Bridgeport home and reportedly encountered a totally naked Collin Moore, who allegedly grabbed a marble urn and attempted to beat an officer with it, spilling the ashes of a dead person on his uniform. Then, things really got crazy. Moore, 19, was eventually subdued (though not before an excited dog in the home bit an officer on the leg). Police briefly unshackled him in order to get some clothes on him. At that point, Moore allegedly lunged at a female officer and reached for her gun as they wrestled on the floor. She punched him several times and he bit her face, police told the Connecticut Post. Officers did manage to get Moore (still back-ass naked) to Bridgeport Hospital.

Lest you think this kind of thing only happens in cities, police in the Litchfield County town of Winsted (population 7,321) got a call from a man who cryptically said he'd be "waiting for" them. They traced it to St. James Church where they reportedly found Ronald Barnes in an alleyway barricaded behind a "fort" made from chunks of concrete, a few two-by-fours and an old snow blower. When officers approached, Barnes, 48, allegedly recited the Lord's Prayer and picked up two pieces of wood "and began swinging them like samurai swords," reports the Register Citizen of Torrington. Barnes, who is apparently homeless, then began throwing pieces of his fort, hitting one officer in the head, according to police. Eventually, he was subdued with a stun gun.

Levon Sowell, a convicted felon suspected of a violent crime in another city, had been seen around New Haven and was the subject of a police bulletin. An officer spotted a vehicle belonging to him in Hamden and engaged in a brief car chase until Sowell, 34, crashed into a fence and then took off on foot, according to police. He was eventually overtaken by a police dog. As he fled, Sowell reportedly discarded the drugs he was carrying, creating a "traceable trail of cocaine, reminiscent of Hansel and Gretel's bread bits," according to the New Haven Register.

A stupid 16-year-old tied a small rope into a noose and left it hanging in the recreation center of New Hartford's Brody Park. Little did he know that a) such nooses have been used for decades to intimidate black people, and b) the center is the workplace of New Hartford's African-American recreation director, Dennis Minor, who in that very building two days prior had launched his bid to become mayor of the town, which is 98-percent white. Police called the act a "youthful indiscretion" and told the Register Citizen that the teen has personally apologized to Minor.

Tiffany Wills was engaged in a loud, obscenity-laced argument with another woman in a residential Norwalk street when a UPS driver passing through told her to quiet down, police told The Hour. Willis, 32, allegedly turned her amped-up mouth on the driver and tried to board his van. Video of the encounter was captured on a cell phone and posted on YouTube. The driver, who was not charged, can be seen slapping and repelling a woman. Someone can be heard eloquently saying, "I'll kill your ass up in this motherfucker!"

Police received a call about an intoxicated man wandering the halls of a Norwalk housing project and reportedly found a dazed Daries Manigo clenching his fist. Slow to respond to officers, Manigo, 29, endured one blast from a stun gun and opened his hand to reveal a few rocks of crack cocaine, which he promptly swallowed, police told The Hour. The judge who later arraigned him told Manigo he was "lucky to be alive."

Copper thieves have been stripping off pieces from the roof of Bristol's newly decommissioned O'Connell Elementary School. City workers took the step of greasing a metal pole on the side of the building they believe the thieves had climbed. On their next visit, the bandits did not take anything but they did retaliate by greasing the door handles to make it difficult for town employees to enter the building, reports WFSB.

Sick, Sad World: 29-year-old Jonathan R. Spann of Bristol was arrested on charges of possessing child pornography, and not just a few jpegs but thousands of images and videos downloaded over the last seven years, according to the Bristol Press. Spann's job? Youth minister, of course, particularly of the New Life Fellowship in Plainville.

Waterbury middle school teacher Patty Betancourt is accused of stealing $13,000 in electricity from Connecticut Light and Power by manipulating her meter, reports WFSB. Think of your last power bill and imagine how long it would take to rack up $13,000.