St. Vincent's Medical Center

St. Vincent's Medical Center (Image courtesy ilovefc.com / March 5, 2013)

Theresa Burden, a nursing student at St. Vincent's Medical Center, was upset at being left off the guest list of a classmate's wedding, so — sensibly enough — she sent a barrage of threatening letters to the Bridgeport hospital, according to police. St. Vincent's first received a letter signed in the name bride-to-be saying she was going to blow up the hospital because coursework was interfering with her wedding planning. Though she denied sending it, St. Vincent's suspended her. The letters, each attributed to a student, continued: "I put explosives on the first floor," "I will blow up St. Vincent's," "Get some MRSA and die." That last one referred to a bacteria and contained a white swab. Police gathered up the nursing students to take a handwriting sample from each, at which point Burden, 37, allegedly broke down and admitted to sending the letters, reports the Connecticut Post.

Derrell Rice's heart is in the right place, even if he is apparently one confused old man. Rice, 68, heard the news that a local school had been forced by court order to allow a student to wear an anti-gay T-shirt after the ACLU filed a lawsuit on the teen's behalf. He reportedly reacted by going to Plymouth Center School to give administrators a piece of his mind. One problem: The school at the center of the suit is Wolcott High School, one town south. Redirected, Rice went to Wolcott Public Schools' administrative building where the superintendent did sit down with him and explain the situation, reports WFSB. Unsatisfied, he allegedly announced he was going to the high school to speak out against homophobia (post-Sandy Hook anxiety over intruders be damned). Rice was eventually arrested on charges of breach of peace and criminal trespass.

The parent of a Weston High School basketball player felt that coach Mike Hvizdo was overlooking his or her son, so he or she dug up a 10-year-old short film starring Hvizdo and used it to get him fired, reports the Weston Forum. Forbidden Fruit, a nine-minute sex comedy made during Hvizdo's flirtation with acting and until very recently available on IMBD, contains no nudity or illegal activity. Still, once the prim and proper administrators of this affluent district reviewed the link sent by the parent, they decided these decade-old dick jokes meant the otherwise popular coach could not ensure a "psychologically-safe and emotionally-healthy environment for our students." Eventually, complaints from parents and students and media attention caused them to relent and rehire Hvizdo.

Speaking of costly dick jokes, state Rep. Ernest Hewett lost his deputy speaker title due to what was perceived as a lewd remark to a 17-year-old intern from the Connecticut Science Center. The teen testified before the Appropriations Committee in favor of money for the center, saying her work eased her shyness and fear of snakes. "If you're bashful, then I have a snake sitting under my desk here," said Hewett, a Democrat from New London. The house speaker took this to be sexual innuendo. Hewett told the Hartford Courant it was an analogy, like "If you believe that, then I have an acre of land in the Everglades to sell you," but says the comment "came out the wrong way."

Three jackasses were arrested after two of them allegedly did stunts on their ATVs in front of East Haven police headquarters and taunted officers to chase them as the third reportedly filmed them. On several occasions, Michael Esposito and Joseph Arcangelo allegedly did wheelies and doughnuts in front of the station. Footage from their helmet cams and videographer Mark Mastracchio, who trailed them in a car, was posted on Facebook, police told the New Haven Register. The trio didn't even get the chase they apparently sought; police identified them on social media, got warrants and arrested them on their own schedule.

Steve M. Niemczyk, who "appeared intoxicated," entered the lobby of Caffery's Dance Studio in Middletown and heckled the young ballerinas in a series of profanity-laden rants, police told the Middletown Press. A teacher scurried the girls into a bathroom as police confronted Niemczyk, 48, who explained he had just stopped in "to see what's going on."

Armandito Ortiz, a manager at the inventor management company InventHelp, allegedly showed a woman responding to a help wanted ad his own invention: the brazen mid-job interview jerk-off. The Connecticut Post reports that Ortiz, 36, reportedly exposed his penis and groped it during the course of an interview at the company's Milford office.

John A. Lesick Jr. was arrested on charges of threatening to kill people at his place of employment which is, ironically, the Albert J. Solnit Psychiatric Center, a mental hospital in Middletown, according to the Middletown Patch website. (Lesick, 43, is a psychiatric nurse.)

A bartender at a Danbury tavern cut off a noticeably drunk Ryan Stites and called the cops when he didn't have cash for the tab and his three credit cards were declined, police told the Danbury News-Times. Stites, 30, reportedly asked the officers to "spot him the 27 dollars" to settle the bill.