News And Views From Half-Baked Jake, Super Bowl Edition

More Roman Numerals Than You Can Count!

This is Half-Baked Jake, Super Bowl edition. Warning: Numerals subject to appear in their Roman form.

News: Caleb Moore dead at XXV after a crash at Winter X Games in Colorado. His snowmobile fell on him as he tried to complete a backflip. Views: This is a tragedy. Snowmobile freestyle also is not a sport. It is competitive daredevilism. Scott Guglielmino, ESPN senior vice president of programming and global X events, said on ESPN's "Outside the Lines" that great care is taken to minimize risks. I believe him. He also called X Games participants "world class athletes." I'd call many of them world-class daredevils. They are circus high-wire acts. When Bob Arum promoted Evel Knievel's jump across the Snake River, it was pointed out in the Los Angeles Times the other day, he brought in Jimmy the Greek to set a line on two bets: Live. Or die. If we as a society are going to be complicit in life-threatening endeavors, closer to going over Niagara Falls in a barrel than scoring a touchdown, at least ESPN ought to identify what Moore competed in as part of its highly dangerous E [entertainment] and not its S [sport]. Views II: Having said that, NFL, NFLPA, quit bickering about a dangerous sport, get the neurological consultants on the sidelines, work together for safety, for God's sake.

News: Bobby Valentine, according to the Connecticut Post, is among the candidates to replace Don Cook as Sacred Heart AD. Views: Bobby V's real goal in life has got to be to replace Jonathan Goldsmith as "The Most Interesting Man in the World" in Dos Equis commercials. … Arguably the best athlete in Connecticut high school history, inarguably the smartest man in the world, ballroom dance champion, inventor of the wrap, manager of the Mets, Red Sox and Chiba Lotte Marines, Stamford director of public safety & health, ESPN and NBC radio analyst, fake mustache wearer ... is there no end to this Renaissance man's renaissance? Really, Bobby at this point, how long could you handle the minutiae of an AD job? Six months?

News: Ryan Gomes honored during the UConn at Providence game for his terrific work with Hoops For Heart charity to distribute defibrillators. One of them saved the life of Utah State basketball player Danny Berger. Views: So here's Kevin Ollie, once Gomes' teammate on the Timberwolves, hugging and talking to the former Providence star in the hallway afterward. "It's too late to recruit him," Half-Baked interjects. "I'm sure we'll be reading that one," George Blaney said, smiling. Hearing this, Ollie walks back to Gomes and says, "You interested in playing for us? We need rebounding." Gomes broke out laughing. And if you don't get the joke, well, Google, "Calhoun, Gomes, YouTube," and take cover when the f-bombs start dropping. … News: Rondo and now Sullinger out for the season. Views: Time to blow up the Celtics. … News: Shawn Thornton out at least a week with a concussion after getting pummeled by a 6-foot-8, 270-pound Sabres winger. Views: Knew Thornton was in trouble when he couldn't remember if he fought John Scott, George Scott or Scott Baio. … News: New York Post reports Dan Marino fathers a child out of wedlock with CBS Sports production assistant Donna Savattere and paid her millions to keep quiet. Views: Fortunately for Marino, the Post spared him of the harshest public detail: He never won a Super Bowl. ... News: Sign held up in Providence student section directed at UConn players: "A.P.R.: Almost Passed Reading." Views: As a native Rhode Islander, now you know where Half-Baked gets his rapier wit.

News: According to The Day of New London, UConn AD Warde Manuel lit into the football team after the end of the season. Views: Good. And I hope he lights into Paul Pasqualoni or George DeLeone if they try to interfere with new offensive coordinator T.J. Weist. News: No. II Quinnipiac vs. No. VIII Yale in biggest regular season college hockey game in state history Saturday. Views: Bobcats should have been No. I in the polls this week, but voters couldn't pull the trigger against a storied program like Minnesota. Would have been like a decade ago putting Boise State ahead of Alabama or Ohio State in football. News: The CRDA Board of Directors will reconvene next week to make a final selection on who will manage the XL Center and Rentschler Field. "The matter of the AHL is a critical item," CRDA executive director Michael Freimuth said. Views: I don't know who among AEG, Global Spectrum and the Bushnell/LAZ-led local group will win. I do know I have one million questions. What kind of improvements will be made to the XL Center. Cosmetic? Drastic? Are the Rangers, despite what they say, bound for Bridgeport? If so, could another AHL franchise be lined up? Waiting for the answers. Then I'll have plenty of views. Bank on it.

News: On Tuesday, San Francisco XLIXers cornerback Chris Culliver told Artie Lange in a radio interview: "Ain't got no gay people on the team. They gotta get up outta here if they do. Can't be with that sweet stuff." On Wednesday he said: "That's not what I feel in my heart." Views: Half of Half-Baked wants to scream, "Be a man. Tell us why you're homophobic!" The other half smiles, realizes slowly, surely, there is progress, and says, "OK, Culliver, prove your apology is sincere." News: "Francona: The Red Sox Years." Views: Buy it for the Sox fan you love, and watch him/her laugh and cry and smash a few windows. Only wished Francona, Dan Shaughnessy and Houghton Mifflin Harcourt called the book "Tito's Revenge," because the Red Sox owners' asses have got to be mighty red these days.

News: Rudy Gay traded from Memphis to Toronto and checked his dreams of an NBA title at customs. Views: Grizzlies coach Lionel Hollins hit the problems of a small market on the head for TNT: "When you have champagne taste, you can't be on a beer budget." ... News: Andre Drummond's player efficiency rating of 21.9 on pace to be the highest of any NBA teenager in history. Yes, better than LeBron. At fewer than 20 minutes a game right now, his projections of 36 minutes a night would give him 13 points, 13 rebounds and three blocks. Views: Evidently there's a lot more man than child in my assertions last spring of "man-child."

News: Ray Lewis denies use of PEDs, including deer antler spray to heal his torn triceps. Views: Hey, I believe him. Suckers like Half-Baked also believe the reindeer antler and Santa Claus story that Ray doesn't know who killed those two guys in Atlanta. News Alert: On Friday, wacky S.W.A.T.S. (Sports With Alternatives to Steroids) owner Mitch Ross, the guy who did all the talking to SI, now says the magazine "catfished" him into telling a one-sided story. He also said God sent him to help the Ravens with holograms. Views Alert: Half-Baked officially feels sorry for catfish everywhere. Humans are giving them a bad name. Speaking of which ... News: Ronaiah Tuiasosopo spoke publicly for the first time with Dr. Phil. Views: Sorry. Can't go there. I heard him do the female voice. I'm too freaked to comment.

News: Alex Rodriguez's spokesman denies ESPN report that Biogenesis operator Anthony Bosch personally administered PED injections. Views: As much as Half-Baked wants to call A-Rod the greatest phony in the history of sports, it would be equally phony not to assert so much of the vitriol in New York has really been about getting rid of the $114 million left on A-Rod's contract. News: Providence coach Ed Cooley sits Vincent Council for 10 minutes because he went against the rule of no social media when he tweeted he wasn't going to start against UConn. Views: If that's the case, Paul Bissonnette of the Phoenix Coyotes should get 10 extra minutes of ice time for tweeting, "I've heard of countries using video of Skip Bayless and Stephen A. Smith arguing together as a form of torture." … News: Super Bowl XLVII. Views: San Francisco XXVII, Baltimore XXIV. And M good wishes to Sandy Hook Elementary chorus when it sings "America the Beautiful" on Sunday.

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