"When the renovations to her house were complete, she always said that she was going to have a garden party and we were all excited to see her house all finished and maybe finally get over there and see what her house was like," Bergquist said.
"That never happened, and maybe she realized that that wouldn't be possible. Not a lot of people went into the house. I assumed that Nancy was very particular, just like me … but I don't think that was it. I think that was a little bit of an excuse and I think that Adam was uncomfortable having too many people around."
The amount of time Adam Lanza spent in the basement alone, playing video games, also has become a subject of police scrutiny, law-enforcement sources told The Courant. Police investigators scoured the house after the rampage and found Lanza's collection of video games in the basement game room.
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Nancy Lanza described renovations to the basement in a Feb. 12, 1999, email to LaFontaine, She said the basement included "a gameroom for the boys. … It will actually be two rooms and a bathroom. In addition, I will have a laundry room/exercise room for myself and perhaps a small shop area for my newest hobby (refinishing antiques)."
A contractor who did extensive work inside the Lanza home in 2011 said he frequently saw Adam Lanza going in and out of his upstairs bedroom.
Bergquist said Adam Lanza slept in the basement gameroom during the renovations in 2011. He said his mother spent her days at the house during the construction and slept at night at an inn in Newtown "because she didn't want to sleep around a big mess. She would go [home] during the day and be with Adam."
But there were stretches when he was alone in the house for days at a time.
During the week leading up to the shooting rampage, Nancy Lanza spent at least one night away in an upscale New Hampshire hotel, while Adam stayed home alone.
It was Wednesday night, Dec. 12, 2012, 36 hours before Adam's rampage. She sent a Facebook message from the fancy dining room to Bergquist. In it, Lanza describes how she is dining next to a finely dressed couple — with tattoos poking out of their evening wear.
"A shimmery evening dress looks less formal with daggers and skulls peeking out," Lanza wrote to Bergquist. "Be forewarned," she added as a joke, "tattoo girl has talked me into a dragon tattoo."
A Plan Of His Own
Earlier in 2012, Nancy Lanza had once again begun to talk with friends and family members about a big change: moving to Washington state or North Carolina so Adam could once again attend college and pursue a degree in history.
To friends and family, Nancy was again looking for the right educational fit for her now adult son — even if it meant leaving New England, where she had lived her entire life.
One family member believes Nancy would not have planned such a move without Adam behind it.
When the family member asked Nancy why, she responded, "You never turn your back on your children," the family member recounted.
She told Tambascio that she planned to continue living with Adam "for a very long time."
And Tambascio said Nancy even sold her beloved Red Sox season tickets as she prepared for the move.
"She seemed excited about it," said Bergquist. "She wanted to get Adam into school and try to have him have some sort of normal life and she seemed excited about the change."
But Adam's father didn't know about the move.
"He was not aware of any discussions about that," said the person close to Peter Lanza.
Tambascio said she had been entertaining a move for some time and appeared to have settled on Washington state.
"For a couple of years she's been looking. And she always told me the last couple of years, 'Mark, I'm gonna be moving. I'm gonna be moving for Adam, I'm gonna be moving.'"
But she never got the chance.
Adam Lanza had plans of his own.
Courant staff writers Dave Altimari and Edmund H. Mahony contributed to this story. Reporting from Frank Koughan, FRONTLINE included.