My Butternut Squash Soup Recipe. Really.

My Thursday Night Butternut Squash Soup Recipe 

Saute 3 cloves of minced garlic in a big pot.

Remove from heat and clean up dog vomit. Forget  that you’re cooking and fold two loads of laundry, look at Facebook, and then remember that you’re making soup. Begin to peel, remove seeds from and cube 1 large butternut squash.


Get phone call from kid who needs to be picked up from cross country meet.

Twenty minutes later, place squash in pot with as much chicken broth you can find that hasn’t expired (I found one quart.) Bring to boil until you realize you realize you need to leave to pick up another kid two towns away. Allow to simmer and hope the house doesn’t burn down.

One hour later, pour mushy mixture into blender in two or three batches, splattering orange soup all over your kitchen and clothes. Pour back into pot and add salt, cinnamon and nutmeg. Remove from heat and go pick up third child.

Thirty minutes later, reheat soup and tell the kids that if they don’t at least try the soup they don’t get to watch The Voice.