The Coveted Weak In Review Endorsements

How Did Donovan, The Job Creator Fair?

Because Tuesday is primary day in Connecticut, The Weak in Review is departing from its usual Weak format to offer endorsements of candidates seeking party nominations for Congress and the Senate. The Weak urges all voters, eligible or otherwise, to go to the polls and exercise their Constitutional right to get even with those whose distorted campaign commercials have annoyed them the most.

GOP U.S. Senate

The choice for voters here is between former Congressman Chris Shays and The Job Creator. For people who don't have televisions, The Job Creator is a woman named also known as Linda who has more money than God and a "compelling" personal story. The Job Creator's compelling personal story is that after graduating from college she and her husband had to struggle for a while before achieving success. Apparently, this is a different story from most people, who after graduating from college immediately start at the top.

While Shays is technically still a Connecticut resident he had been spending most of his time the last several years at some Chesapeake Bay burg where he has a house on the water. So if he is elected he probably wouldn't spend much time in the state. We don't see this as a negative. In fact, the sole redeeming feature of retiring Sen. Joe Lieberman's last term is that he hasn't been around much. People who eat in diners have been particularly appreciative of this.

While The Weak has always been leery about backing anyone named Shea (Shays is close enough), it reluctantly offers it endorsement of Shays because when it comes to politicians absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Why not The Job Creator?

Because anyone who spends $64 million (and counting) of her own money just to become a United States senator lacks common sense.

Democratic U.S. Senate

The choices here are Congressman Chris Murphy or former Secretary of the State Susan Bysiewicz. Let's keep this short and sweet. The Weak backs Murphy because he has a "compelling" financial disclosure statement. In fact, he may be in worse financial shape that The Weak. And wouldn't it be refreshing to have someone in office that is actually worse off than the average person?

Why not Bysiewicz?

Although her politics are in sync with those of The Weak, the once formidable candidate has taken to shooting herself in the foot so often it's a wonder she can still squeeze into a pair of heels. I mean, running an attack ad you admit isn't truthful? The Job Creator would make mince meat out of Bysiewicz.

GOP 5th Congressional District

The choice here is clear, Andrew Roraback. The Weak endorses Roraback because The Weak used to live in his district and can't remember him as being particularly off the wall.

The same, of course, cannot be said of candidate Mark Greenberg.

As for Justin Bernier, he is a former Naval intelligence officer, and if there is one thing that renders a congressman ineffective in Washington it is even the slightest association with intelligence.

Finally, there is Lisa Wilson-Foley, whose fitness for office can be summed up thusly: She used former Gov. John Rowland as a campaign adviser and now seems surprised she has become involved in a federal investigation.

Democratic 5th Congressional District

The Weak was all set to endorse Christopher Donovan mainly because Donovan is a bleeding-heart liberal like The Weak. But then Donovan's campaign staff started getting arrested, prompting The Weak to abandon this sinking ship. The Weak has many qualities, loyalty not being one of them.

As for the choice between Elizabeth Esty and Daniel Roberti, The Weak prefers Esty because she appears more principled than your average member of Congress, which, admittedly, is not a particularly high bar. As for Roberti, The Weak keeps confusing him with his father, Vin Roberti, and remains unsure which one is the big time Washington fundraiser and lobbyist.

Republican 2nd Congressional District

The Weak strongly endorses Daria Novak for the nomination mostly because she will be an easier opponent for Congressman Joe Courtney to defeat in November. The major reason The Weak opposes the other candidate, Paul F. Formica, is because he was the choice of The Courant's editorial page, and The Weak has issues with the editorial page over the mean letters to the editor it often prints critical of The Weak.

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