Supermarket Aisles For Men Only? Nah. But A Checkout Lane? Now You're Talking

Jim Shea
Contact ReporterThe Hartford Courant

Supermarkets are not arranged logically.

If they were:

The beer would be next to the chips.

The junk food would be next to the diet soda.

The toilet paper would be next to the magazines.

I've read that the reason supermarkets don't always put things where you would expect to find them is because they want you to wander around and be tempted to buy other stuff on impulse.

You'd think this search-and-seduce strategy would have little effect on me given I don't know where anything is and all my trips to the super market resemble an episode from "Lost."

That said, I do usually end up buying stuff about which I can't recall ever having previously had a conscious thought.

I remember this one time I was sent to the store for sugar and among the unauthorized items I returned home with was a can of beets. Who buys beets? I suspect I was the victim of some type of mind control linked to the music.

A grocery store in New York City thinks it might be onto something with a concept called the Man Aisle, or as the more geographically astute refer to is, The Aisle of Man.

The idea is fairly straight forward: group together in one place all of the items a male shopper might be most interested in.

And what would these items be?

This is where the concept gets a bit stereotypical-ish.

Beer, of course, would be on the top of any such list, followed by bags of salt-delivery snacks, hair goop, female-attracting sprays, body-odor depressants, red-meat enablers such as barbecue sauce and ketchup, and multicolored birth-prevention gear.

What, no 10W-30, no golf balls, no power tools, no flat screen TVs, no little booth where you can get a tattoo?

If supermarkets really want to accommodate male shoppers I think a better way would be with a males-only express checkout lane.

This Men's Express Lane would have no restrictions as far as number of items but would prohibit any and all of the following:

Using coupons.

Writing a check.

Fumbling for correct change.

Also, it probably wouldn't hurt if at the entrance to the Men's Express Lane they put the rotisserie chickens display.

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