Tonight on “Dancing with the Stars,” each couple did two full dances. As the couples were introduced, Jacoby Jones was wearing a cowboy hat. We didn’t find out why until his first routine, which turned out to be a Viennese waltz to “It’s a Man’s World.” And the cowboy hat is missing now. Huh.
They replay Jacoby’s mom yelling at Len last week. My parents are worried she might be turning voters off. We viewers love a protective mom, but we also don’t like people griping or talking back to the judges too much. We are a conflicted bunch, us. Anyway, his mom visits rehearsal and gives them a pep talk.
I’m worried about Jacoby in a waltz, because frame is such a big part of this dance. Also, he’s wearing spats and as pigeon toed as he can be, he probably shouldn’t be doing ANYthing to draw attention to his feet.
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It’s a sexy dance, given the song. At one point Jacoby is facing the judges’ table, particularly Carrie Ann, and pops open his shirt. The crowd goes wild. And even though they do a “death spiral” move at the end that isn’t my favorite, it ends with Jacoby standing over Karina and then, using only one arm, lifting her straight off the floor. I mean, I know he’s a professional athlete and she weighs not more than a couple of feathers, but still. Also, hot move. I imagine a lot of women will picture themselves as Karina in that pose.
Carrie Ann mentions her appreciation of the shirt coming open and then praises Jacoby’s fluidity and posture. Len asks Jacoby’s mom what she thought of it and she hollers, “I loved it,” and Len hollers back, “So did I!” and says to Jacoby, “Great footwork! Yes, thank you, Jacoby!” Bruno agrees with an “Absolutely.”
Scores: Carrie Ann 9, Len 9, Bruno 9. Total of 27.
I’m surprised he didn’t get a 10 from at least one of them.
Jacoby says he’s hoping Twitter chooses the Charleston or the Lindy Hop for their dance next week. Personally, I think he’d KILL a disco, with all the lifts such a routine would allow. It’s also possible I just want to see him in tight pants and a silk shirt. I AM ONLY HUMAN.
For their trio round, Jacoby and Karina are dancing with Cheryl Burke. Jacoby says, “I picked her because, one, she’s another gorgeous woman, and two, she can dance her butt off.” Right on both counts, Mr. Jones. Cheryl teases him that now he’s got two “b****es” to deal with.
In rehearsals, Jacoby is struggling a bit with the paso doble, particularly its strong footwork. He says at one point, “I’m no [bleep] tap dancer.” Jacoby then talks about the difficulty of having two partners, doing a good impression of a pinball. His first try at a leap does not go well, but this double death spiral looks intriguing.
Lucky for Jacoby, he gets traditional paso doble music instead of some pop song shoehorned into the style. They walk down the floor with the two women flanking Jacoby, and it’s impossible not to see the pigeon toes, but they are some fiercely stomped pigeon toes. At the end of the stage, he twirls both women under his arms at the same time. It looks really cool. Then the women are dancing together in frame with Jacoby. This works because Jacoby is so tall he has long arms to work with. Karina and Cheryl leave Jacoby at the top of the stage, and they dance together back to the bottom of the stage and then pose huddled together. Jacoby takes a running start and jumps BOTH of them. He’s the Evel Knievel of the ballroom!
Then he and Karina have a solo, just the two of them. After some impressive coordinated cape work, mostly from the women, the routine ends with Cheryl and Karina standing back to back at the bottom of the stage and Jacoby running at them. Just when you think he’s going to jump them AGAIN, he slides between their legs and ends the routine on his back, doing a Tony Kornheiser penguin dance.
Carrie Ann says he has an impressive presence on the floor, but that he tossed Cheryl after her drag and then later tossed his cape on her, leading to her getting her foot tangled in it. Carrie Ann admonishes Jacoby, “A man is supposed to take care of his women on the dance floor.” Jacoby pleads, “But they TOLD me to toss them.” I wonder if that face of innocence worked on his mom when he was a kid.
Len stands up to give his praise and is suddenly almost Bruno-like with his expressiveness. Len loved Jacoby's hands. Bruno liked the passion of the dance, but then critiques Jacoby’s posture and his “Spanish lines,” demonstrating what it should look like.
Scores: Carrie Ann 8, Len 9, Bruno 8. Total for the night: 52 out of 60.
Apparently, Twitter is choosing disco for Jacoby at the moment. Karina says she’ll put him in an Afro wig. There is no way America doesn’t vote to see that. I’ve got three twitter accounts, and I’ll use all of them to get my votes in.